Look at Her Now!!

It was 9 months ago that we met our little girl Hannah.  She was a shy and scared little chunky thing.  Now she is very outgoing for the most part and has no problems telling us all no no.  It  comes out as mo mo and she's shaking her finger at us at the same time.  She still has another surgery to go through to repair her palate, which will then help her immensely with her speech.  I thought I would post some before and after pictures.

......AND NOW.....

October Catch up/Baring the Soul

I have not been doing well keeping up with this blog.  Life has taken over and 3 kids are definitely way more than 2.  I have gone back to work and both boys are in soccer.  We've had Cody's and Michael's birthdays in September and here we are in October already.

I don't know if I have been very honest with everyone about this whole adoption process.  I've shared more on Facebook and with my close friends in person.  One of my friends that I made through this adoption process, is very eloquent in the way she has described her issues with her adopted daughter.  I can't even come close, but I will try.
  Hannah is a cutie.  She can be very funny, but she is also very stubborn and at times very defiant.  I have little to no patience when it comes to her.  I envisioned a sweet little girl when I was going through the adoption process, and then reality hit.  They are not the same.  God is apparently teaching me how to love her and to grow with her in the loving process b/c she doesn't know how to love.  She now will kiss and hug us whereas before she wouldn't do either.  She does not like to cuddle and won't sit still for anything.  As a mother, I long for those cuddly moments and for my child to respond in the ways that I need, but she doesn't.  She makes it very difficult for me to even like her at times.  I know this is harsh, but it's how I feel.  I know I am not alone when I express my feelings as an adoptive mother and I want other mother's to know that they are not alone or crazy either.  There is help out there.  There are specialists that deal with attachment disorders and yes I have begun seeing one.  I am trusting that the Lord will help me to eventually love Hannah with all my heart and soul, just like my boys.

Now here are some pictures that highlight the last month or so.

The first day of school.

Our goalie, Cody.

Cody's 10th birthday party at Interskate 88.

Hannah after eating her chocolate cupcake at Cody's party.

Collin and his good friend Nolan at Cody's party.

Big cousin Jetta pushing Hannah on her bike.